I wish I could deny that I have seen the episode of "the office" where Jan explains to everyone the details of her home birth in a birthing tub but I can't. I actually cringe at that episode because of how ignorant she seems to be that everyone is embarrassed by her TMI. With that said, no worries: no TMI in this blog.
I chose a home birth for one main reason...I wanted to have as natural a birth as possible without being talked into interventions or a cesarean. I was fearful of most OB's because of how notorious Memphis is for cesareans and its outrageously high infant mortality rate. In the process, I actually learned a wealth of information about the pros and cons to hospital and home births. But say no more I'm not writing to exert my opinion...just my story.
My due date was no earlier than August 24 and no later than September 3. By the end of July, I was begging God to let me go into labor early! I felt so uncomfortable! As August rolled around, Daniel and I were house/dog sitting for some good friends and we were really enjoying the household amenities that we lack in out apt (washer/dryer/dishwasher...ah, heaven). While we were staying there I went into labor and it wasn't anything gross...just 10 min apart contractions. My labor started August 6 at 10 am. I called Daniel and he came home from school to help me clean up the house and get ready to go over to my parents house to have the baby.
We took our time because the mid-wife said that it would be a while before I delivered. Labor wasn't that bad. I had to take a breather every 10 min but I wasn't dying of pain...yet. 12 hrs later, we were finally at my parents house, my water broke. Good grief, I never felt more pain like that in my life. 5 min after my water broke, my brother-in-law comes over for a visit. At that point, I hadn't had a severe contraction yet. As we were in conversation, I start screaming with no ability to calm myself...poor guy...he'll probably never want to marry now. He left quickly and that's when all the birthing class practices and knowledge went out the window! I didn't breath like I was supposed to. I didn't want to listen to Daniel, my supportive doulas. I didn't let Daniel touch me except to place cold rags on my head. I didn't even open my eyes for a long time after that. (10 PM)
I was in hard labor for 1 hour...I think I was lucky but I felt far from that during each contraction. At that point I hopped in the tub...which didn't make me feel any better. A contraction came, I tensed up, and my mid-wife would tell me to just go with the contraction....whhhhaaaa? I was hurtin' like holiness...go with the contraction??? so what did I do? Didn't listen...I had no idea how to calm down. (Plus we still had 1 more birthing class to make and it was called 'what to do when you panic during labor'...that would have been helpful).
(11 PM) I was still in the tub and had the urge to push...so I did. This was the best part because the hard labor was over. Pushing didn't hurt me at all. I pushed for 31 min and then our baby girl was born. I was thankful for the tub because I was buoyant and there weren't any uncomfortable pressures on my body as she was coming into the world.
So that's the story...with many unnecessary details left out. I was glad I did a home birth! I'm healing quickly and adjusting to being a mom and a mom as a wife.
Oh by the way, Daniel was the man! He was so encouraging and really great at helping me stay focused till the end! I kept saying, "I can't do this...I can't do this..." and he would calmly and reassuringly say, "Yes you can, Lindsay"
For first time 'moms to be' that read this anyway, the first week is tough. Listen to your gut and make boundaries if you have to. I loved all our visitors very much but I began to get overwhelmed as I was trying to figure out how to nurse and deal with the surge of hormones that were leveling out (I was 10x more emotional this past week than I was during pregnancy). I cried a lot and really needed to spend a large amount of time alone with the Lord, the baby, and Daniel in order to be at peace as I was figuring out the first few days of being a mom. So we had to stop having visitors which was not their fault but my need to get myself together. There is almost a spiritual rebirth that comes after the first week of having a newborn! You feel mobile, capable to sleep more comfortably, learning your baby, and an ease with the dreaded 'nursing.' Hang in there, it gets easier! REST. Rest. Rest.
Lindsay Freeman blogs at To The End of the Age . She is an amazing artist and an excellent writer. She writes so beautifully about spiritual issues, among other things. She is a dear friend and one of my few real life moms that is a misfit mama like myself here in Memphis. I love her dearly. Check out her blog
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