Memphis Misfit Mama's home birth story. One year ago today...

My firstborn, baby girl's birth story.  I cannot believe it has been a whole year!

 One year ago today (May 13th, 2010) I was in labor with my sweet baby girl, although I didn't know she was a girl at the time. We decided to do a homebirth and you can read all about that decision here.

First of all, I had been praying that God would allow me to labor during the day and that I could labor and birth in the labor tub. And of course, that the baby and I were healthy and well. He granted all my prayers and I give Him all the glory. Only His strength got me through the labor and birth, and it was a delight to depend on Him to guide me through this labor. He is my Creator and created me to birth, along with all women. It was fabulous to labor and birth in our home. I thank God for a great labor and birth and healthy baby girl.  

A day before I went into labor my midwife came to my house for my appointment and to check me. I knew that whether or not I was dilated or effaced had no indication as to when I would go into labor but I was curious, so I was checked for the first time at almost 40 weeks. I don't remember what I was when she checked me but there wasn't much going on and I assumed it would be awhile. But I knew that my body could switch into gear at any moment as well so I just tried to trust the Lord on the timing and do all I could to get labor going. (I had been taking some herbs for weeks, walking every day, among other natural labor inducing activities ;)

My labor may have begun early in the morning on May 13th, as I woke up around 6am with cramping, but I passed it off as Braxton Hicks. But something told me the day was getting close regardless, so I got up early and walked the dogs, hoping to move the baby down and get things going. (I had been trying to walk about 2-3 miles every day) I went to teach ESL class at 8:30am, and around 9 I noticed rhythmic cramping, but still didn't know for sure if it was labor. I continued to teach class through these early contractions now even knowing if I was actually in labor. I arrived home around 10:45am, and at 11am I called my midwife while taking a bath.  The contractions were about 5 or 6 minutes apart but hardly painful at all and only lasting about 30 seconds each. She told me to keep her posted, and I laid down to rest. 

I put on a movie and continued to keep track of contractions, still thinking it may be Braxton Hicks because they weren't very painful at all. Around 1pm they started getting more intense, and I called Ben to tell him to come straight home from work as quickly as possible when he got off at 2pm just in case I was in labor. When he got home, he helped me time contractions and we decided to call the midwife again around 3:30pm because they were about 4-5 minutes apart and getting stronger. She told me to take a shower and see if they stopped...they did not. They got more consistent and stronger. I had now begun to have to use breathing techniques through some of them. I asked Ben to make me some french toast and he called the midwife to tell her to come on over. 

I ate french toast between contractions and started drinking a lot of juice.(one huge advantage to birthing at home) I labored leaning my head on the ottoman for much of the time, while I waited for the pool to fill up. The midwife and doula arrived around 5pm or so.Once the tub was ready, I was in it almost constantly, with bathroom breaks. It was probably around 5:30pm or so when I got in the tub. At this point the contractions were about 3 minutes apart and stayed this way for what seemed like forever, although looking back it all went very quickly. I preferred laboring on hands and knees mostly, or leaning over the tub. 

Ben was with me every step of the way, encouraging me and helping me stay calm, giving me water to drink and keeping my temperature comfortable. It was so sweet to have that time just Ben and I. My midwife and doula hung out in the living room and gave us our time and allowed me to do my thing and trust my body. She would come in from time to time to monitor the baby for a couple of contractions and check on us. From this point, I basically just breathed through contractions and rested in between. The pain was very manageable as long as I kept focused on my breathing and not the pain. Ben would touch my face to give me another feeling to focus on besides contractions. There were only a few contractions that were really painful, but most all were very manageable. There were times during the painful ones where I thought to myself "I can't do this" and I would just try to think about the Lord and the strength He would give me. I am thankful I was birthing at home because during those few really bad contractions I am afraid I would have given in and got meds had I been in a hospital. (although I was probably too far dilated for that at this point) We had worship music playing the entire time and it was so great to hear it and at times to hear others singing along to some of the songs. At one point I heard some worship songs that are some of my favorites and it gave me extra strength to persevere. We had the lights low the whole time and candles going so it was such a relaxing atmosphere. (I should add that my mom had arrived by this point and was also a great source of encouragement)

Around 11:00pm I was beginning to feel the urge to push, and then around 11:30pm I couldn't stop from pushing. I had just gotten out of the tub to try to rest before I began pushing because I was so tired and felt I couldn't do it anymore. The midwife was about to check me when all of a sudden I just HAD to get back in the water because I was in so much pain and felt I had to push. (So I was never once checked during my whole birth. We just trusted my body to do its thing). I had hoped to push and deliver on hands and knees but the baby's heart rate dropped in this position so I had to change to sitting. I pushed in the sitting squatting position the whole time, resting in between in the warmth of the birthing tub, with my sweet husband right behind me encouraging me. At one point, they kept telling me they could see my bag of waters bulging and as soon as it broke the head would be right behind. This was definitely encouraging, but I had no idea how much longer the pushing would take. One of the midwives said, "we might have a baby by midnight" and I thought, "no way". Once the bag broke they began telling me they could see the baby's head and that gave me tons of encouragement. When she was crowing it was really painful. Fortunately she was only there for about one or two pushing contractions, but that was probably the worst pain. They put the mirror down there so I could see, but all I could do was keep my eyes closed and focus through the contractions. Finally (I say finally but it was really after only 45 minutes of pushing) around 12:11am on May 14th I pushed out her head. She had the cord wrapped around her a few times but the midwives quickly took care of that, I gave one final push, and out she came...into the water and into my arms at 12:13am May 14th, 2010. She was wide awake and so calm...just staring intently into my eyes.(This moment was well worth going natural. A non-medicated baby is SO alert and I was as well of course) We waited for the cord to stop pulsing before cutting that and getting out of the water.

Finally someone reminded Ben to look and see what the baby was...and he announced "It's a Girl". I was soooo happy. I had a feeling it was a girl and would have been so surprised to get a boy. She was just beautiful. She nursed  not long after she was born and was able to have lots of skin to skin contact with both Ben and myself. (I delivered the placenta about 45 minutes after she was born but will spare those details) Everyone left the room after she was born so we could have time alone with her to nurse and decide on a name. After a couple of hours they weighed her and all that jazz. She was 6lbs, 13 ounces and 20.25 long.

My mom and brother Jordan were there to see the delivery, as well as Ben's mom. Soon after she was born my grandparents and aunt Dawn arrived. We were so blessed to be able to have as much family there as we wanted. 

The next day my dad, step mom, step brother, and brother Erik came, along with Ben's dad. We had a birthday party for her Friday night. :) 

It is so great to be a mom and to have this precious baby. It is such a sweet experience and it was wonderful to experience this with my precious husband. I highly recommend a home birth to anyone who is low-risk and wants to go natural. It was a beautiful experience that I will cherish forever.

I thank God for the little miracle. I can't believe that just a year ago she was inside of me. What a miracle pregnancy and childbirth are. All designed by our loving Creator.

 

Why We Used a Midwife and Had a Homebirth...it's in my genes!

 I posted this over a year ago on my previous blog, but I thought it would be fun to share before I share my birth story.

It’s weird to me to even feel like I have to explain why we are using a midwife because I grew up thinking natural home births were common. That’s probably because my mom had me on the couch at my doctor’s house with a midwife assisting. Then I witnessed (along with the rest of my family…grandpa and all) the natural births of both of my brothers at the doctor’s birthing clinic. It wasn’t scary at all to watch my mom go through birth naturally and without medication, it was such a neat experience that I thought was “normal”.  She birthed each of us and was home in a matter of hours.

As I grew up and started hearing about people having babies in a hospital and having to stay a few days, I thought that was so weird. Come to find out, most of the world thinks the way my mom did things was weird, but not to me. That’s my norm.

And it doesn’t stop there. Both of my aunts on my dad’s side, had all of their children at home, one was even a breach, and was perfectly healthy. My aunt Terri had all 5 children at home. Talk about a wonder woman! And I am so proud of my cousin Kindra for being a certified midwife! Yay! Go Kindra! I wish you lived closer or I lived closer or whatever.


So I never really questioned what I would do if given the option (some states still have laws that don’t allow you to make your own choice about your own birth). I knew I would birth at home or in a clinic with a midwife or a “natural doctor”. Well, I’m not sure Memphis has “natural doctors”…if anyone knows of one let me know. And Memphis has no birthing clinics. So, as long as everything proceeds well and I remain low-risk, the plan is to give birth at home with my midwife and husband assisting.

So am I just choosing this because its in my genes? Well, no…I did my research. I think every woman should research all the birthing options out there before deciding. So often we just go with what we think is the only option, or whatever we are used to or think is the norm.  I don’t have anything against hospitals. I am very thankful for hospitals and doctors. I have seen doctors and been to hospitals before, but I try to stay away if I can.  But I don’t view birth as a medical condition, so I began to think “why would I treat it like one?” For a woman that is low-risk a home birth is just as safe or safer than birthing in a hospital. And I am oh so excited that I won’t have fluorescent lights in my face. And I am also pumped that I can eat if I want, and move around, and get in the birthing tub! Woohoo! I am so excited about that! And if I want to watch movies and listen to music or walk around the block I can do that too, although I don’t want to scare the neighbors. haha
So anyway, I am really excited about laboring in the comfort of my own home with my wonderfully talented and capable midwife assisting, and my precious husband. And we also plan on letting my mom assist since she is a pro! I will be so sad if I am like 3 weeks overdue and the baby is 11 lbs and I am forced to be induced. I am so praying I can follow our desired birth plan.

I have dear friends who have birthed naturally in a hospital (either because of state laws or personal preference) and had great experiences. But actually one of them has naturally birthed in a hospital twice and plans on using a midwife next time so that will be fun! And I have a best friend that had complications and had to have a c-section. Of course she wasn’t excited about it, but it is what was needed for a safe outcome.  So please do not hear my passion for midwife and homebirth as judgement on anyone who does things differently.

But I think people need to be informed about other birthing options, because so many women think a hospital birth with an iv, epidural, and pitocin is the only way. And so many doctors make it seem this way as well. All the women I’ve talked to that have had home births have totally loved their birthing experience. But I also know woman who have birthed in the hospital that have loved it too.

Now don’t get me wrong, I am not excited about the pain. But I am excited about trusting my body and learning how to deal with the pain through natural childbirth. And I am excited about being alert during and after birth so I can remember the experience (well,as much as that is possible) and so I can hold my baby right away. Oh yea, that is another thing that is so great about homebirth. The midwife is so sensitive to let the mother and baby bond and work around that.  That is a great plus to homebirth.

Some people might be offended or feel like I judge them for not having a home birth, or natural birth. Not the case. I just want to express the birthing option I am passionate about and give it some PR because I don’t think enough women look into or are educated about it. So when I post links and articles that is for education not condemnation. Read them if you want to learn more about another birthing option, and if you don’t want to learn don’t read them. I can’t make you. Just like you can’t make me go get strapped down in a hospital. 
A safe delivery and a healthy baby is the most important thing, no matter what birthing process takes place. I just think not enough women know about the benefits of home birth so that’s why I share.
And I wanted to share why I am personally deciding on this birthing method for all those people out there who say, “what the heck? chalise is using a midwife?” yes, that’s the plan…but learn about it before you freak out.


link to my midwife’s site: www.chosenbirths.com
great website www.mybestbirth.com
great movie: www.thebusinessofbeingborn.com
www.birthingnaturally.net

Brianna Graber from Fountain of Love shares Viviana's home birth story

Dearest Viviana Marie,

You arrived! May 18, 2010 at 9:37am. You were 8lbs 2oz, 20 ¾” long, and had a 14” head. You have lots of gorgeous dark hair, and big, dark eyes. You’re a precious, beautiful bundle of joy, and you couldn’t ask for parents who love and adore you more. And here, Sweet Girl, is the story of your birth- a story so perfect only God could’ve written it…

For about a week leading up to your birth, I started having more consistent contractions, on and off. They were still very light, but would often stay at a consistent rate apart for a few hours, before dwindling off, and then pick up again later. My body was preparing and getting ready for the big day! On Saturday, the 15th, I lost my mucus plug, as my body continued to prepare. We had a busy weekend with Daddy’s ultimate tournament, and visiting the zoo to celebrate Uncle Brenner’s birthday, but not much in the way of contractions. My midwife, Cindy Rogel (who was also Grandma Carmichael’s midwife for several babies, and Grandma Graber’s for one), was going to be out of town the following week, due to family stuff that had come up, so you ended up being delivered by her back-up, Joselle Weiss. I got to meet her earlier in the pregnancy, because Cindy also had a daughter getting married around my due date, and got to see Joselle in action at a friend’s birth. Her philosophies were very similar to Cindy’s, and there were a lot of things I appreciated about her, so after a brief stress-out over the large time frame Cindy wouldn’t be available, I decided that God knew who was needed at your birth, and would arrange the timing accordingly.

Monday morning I woke up around 1, and every 15 or 20 minutes afterwards with cramping and contractions that were quite a bit stronger than the previous Braxton Hicks. Around 3, they became firmer, and were a steady 4-5 minutes apart, lasting 45-75 seconds. I couldn’t sleep through them, so I got up and did some light housework, in preparation for the possibility of that being your birthday. Around 4:45 I decided to call Grandma C., and ask what she thought. I didn’t want to ask her and the midwife to come out early if it wasn’t the real thing yet, but everything seemed consistent, and significantly different from all the previous prep my body had done. She though it sounded good, and I should call Joselle, so I woke Dad up and asked him to start filling the pool. I called Joselle a little after 5 to give her a head’s up, and she suggested my calling again in an hour or so to let her know where things were at.

Around 5:20 contractions started gaining in intensity, and became a little closer. I started craving getting in the water, and was looking forward to having the pool filled. In the meanwhile, I focused on getting things ready for the birth, and relaxing through the contractions. At 6:30 I got in the pool, and it finished filling shortly thereafter. Joselle thought she should come out and check on things, so Grandma arrived at 7:10, and Joselle a few minutes later. Being in the water slowed things down a little bit, but contractions still stayed 4-5 minutes apart.

At 9:15 I got out of the pool, and Joselle did the first internal exam. Because of how the cervix was positioned, and how high up it was, she couldn’t feel how far I was dilated. She said, though, that baby’s head was in a perfect position and once the cervix moved into place, I would probably dilate very effectively. She was right- but it was a long time before the cervix moved into place. If I could do it again, now having felt and experienced labor, I probably would’ve worked at going through the day more normally, instead of focusing on the fact I was in labor. Having no previous experience to compare it to, though, your birth was mostly a learning curve for me.

Around 11:30am I got out of the pool at Joselle’s suggestion, and stayed out for the rest of the day. I spent the rest of the day alternating walking around, resting, sitting on the birthing ball, etc. I tried napping during the afternoon, and Daddy laid down with me, touching me and helping lull me to sleep in between contractions. I had a couple more internal exams through out the day- she could feel that I was dilated to about 1 centimeter, but the cervix was still really high and needed to drop before things could start moving.

Joselle had a prenatal to do in the evening, and ended up going home after that. It was slightly disappointing to be at what felt like a stand still- but I was really tired, and thought maybe labor would just taper off and kick back in in the morning, which was a welcome idea. I was also encouraged by the fact that no matter what I did or didn’t do, labor didn’t go away, so we would be holding you soon. Grandma decided to stay the night, at our request. We decided to watch a movie, but my contractions picked up a lot in intensity, and got closer together. I had to work harder at relaxing through them. Around 9, I got in the pool to try and take the edge off the contractions, hoping maybe they’d slow down some and I could sleep a little. It didn’t seem to help too much, so we decided to go to bed around 11. I threw up, and contractions continued to get stronger. They were 90 seconds long, and about 3 minutes apart. Daddy worked really hard at getting me to relax through the contractions and rest in between. He was a wonderful support- your birth was completely a team effort, that couldn’t have been nearly the beautiful story it was without Dad. He gently reminded me to relax when I started tensing up. I decided to try standing in the hot shower, because I couldn’t sleep and was having a hard time dealing with the contractions lying down. It helped slightly, and I stayed in till the hot water ran out, then went in the living room for a while. Around 1:30, I went in Grandma’s room to talk to her about the new developments. She was up, and suggested we drain a little of the water in the pool (it was pretty cool the night before) and refill with hot water. Daddy, who managed to fall asleep for about an hour, after I had assured him I wanted him to try sleeping and would get him if I needed him, came out and helped with the pool draining/filling.

It felt nice to get in the water again, though the contractions were still really intense. I was so tired I kept falling asleep during the 30-60 seconds between contractions. It took a lot of effort, energy, and work to relax through the contractions- more than I had anticipated. Since I was so tired I kept slipping into loosing my focus once the contraction hit its peak point. Daddy quietly cheered me on, reminding me I was doing a great job, prayed for me, and supported me physically. Grandma kept reminding me to relax when she saw me start to tense up during a contraction. She was a perfect mix- understanding and encouraging, but forceful about the fact that I needed to relax, pointing out when certain body parts started tensing up. I started each contraction determined to relax through it, but started to loose my focus more than once. Daddy’s emotional support was such a huge encouragement, especially when I felt like I wasn’t doing as well at handling the contractions as I should be…he would remind me that I was doing great, in spite of being too weary to focus on relaxing as much as I needed to. When I felt too weary to go on, he supported me and reminded me that I absolutely could do it, no matter what I thought. Somewhere in that time frame, my water broke.

After I asked Grandma about when we should call Joselle, Grandma called her at 4, and Joselle (who lives 45 minutes away) arrived at 5. I had thrown up several more times before she got there, which she said made for great dilation contractions. I felt a lot of pressure, so I felt certain the cervix had dropped, and I was hoping I had dilated fairly far, but didn’t want to get my hopes up. So, we were elated when Joselle checked me around 6, and said the cervix was fully dilated, and everything was ready to go. It was thrilling, and a little energizing to realize we were down to the final stretch, and most likely would soon be holding you.

I started bearing down with each contraction, but didn’t start serious pushing till around 7. I made low-throated noises through the contractions, which helped me focus on putting all my energy downwards, towards pushing you out, so I didn’t get tired too fast. Joselle coached me through the pushing, telling me how to make my pushing effective so I didn’t get tired with ineffective pushing. It felt good to push, and do something with the contractions, that helped instead of being tempted to tense up against them. Grandma and Daddy continued the reminders to relax, and that I could do it. Around 8:30 we finally had your head in a full crown. It was so exciting to get to feel your head, which was covered in dark hair. Throughout the pushing, Joselle had me alternate my positions between squatting, hands and knees, and tailor sitting, which seemed to help bring you down. We were down to the home stretch, with no turning around! My pushing became even more serious and down-to-business…I was very eager to meet you. You had a hard time fitting through, and my perineum did some major stretching. Joselle helped it along, and supported and massaged it to prevent tearing. In spite of best pushing efforts, and Joselle’s attempts at pulling the probably area you were stuck on out of the way, you stayed in a full crown for an hour. It was encouraging to be able to reach down and feel your head when the pushing got long, and the pressure intense. Joselle, Grandma, and Daddy all prayed for us throughout the labor and birth. Specifically when you were stuck at a full crown, they prayed for strength and endurance for me, and that you’d be able to fit through perfectly. They reminded that God had designed my body for your birth. Finally, just as Joselle was contemplating offering to do a small episiotomy, your beautiful head came through. Everyone was ecstatic, though I remember mentioning in response to someone saying the hard part was over that we still had the shoulders to go. A couple more pushes, though, and we had the shoulders (with your arms crossed over them) out…in the next moment you were lifted out and into my arms. I gave a cry of delight as so many emotions flooded over me. You were so perfectly beautiful, and gave a lusty cry as soon as we lifted you out of the water. I nestled you against my chest, and we covered you with a towel. You were a little purplish, so Joselle had Daddy start rubbing you down right away, and you quickly pinked up. Then I checked to see if you were a girl or boy- and was pleasantly surprised to see God had given us a daughter. Though we didn’t have a preference, we thought we were more likely to have a boy...we were thrilled God had given you to us. Daddy really loves having a princess to love and adore.

The placenta was about an hour in coming. Daddy started draining the pool shortly after you were born, so the water was pretty much completely gone by the time the placenta was birthed. I wasn’t sure where the energy to push the placenta out was going to come from, but eventually, after some position changing, we did it. You enjoyed nestling against my breast, and latched on and nursed for a few minutes. You also got to enjoy Daddy’s arms- it was so special to get to hand you- our baby- to him.

After the placenta was birthed, I got cleaned up, and into bed which Grandma had made up and prepared for us. You nestled up with me, greatly enjoying skin-to-skin contact, and nursed some more. After checking me, Joselle left. Grandma stayed for several more hours, and helped with some of the various clean up, as well as making sure you had a good latch for breastfeeding. You were exhausted after the experience of entering the world, and did lots of sleeping. After lunch, our new little family of 3 took a nap together, and then Grandma Graber and Aunt Annie came to bring dinner and see you.

We’re so grateful for you, and the birth experience God blessed us with! Pregnancy and birth has always been really special to Grandma, and I eagerly anticipated experiencing it, instead of only dreaming about what your birth would be like. Although there were things I could’ve done differently, and relaxing took more work than I felt like I had the energy for, God blessed us with a beautiful birth- I couldn’t have asked for a more perfect labor or delivery…and I definitely couldn’t ask for a more perfect daughter!

Brianna blogs at  Fountain of Love about her family, mothering topics, as well as natural living. She is an excellent and thorough writer (as you can tell) and I encourage you to check out her blog and show her some love.

Kicking Off Birth Story Week...Stacy Leigh of My Messy Manger shares her story of a planned home birth that ended up in a C-section, and her thoughts on how things turned out

Jude’s Birth

Jude was due Saturday, February 7th, 2009, and we were planning to welcome him into our arms in the comfort of our own home. By mid-December, my midwife started to get concerned that he was still breech. She suggested that we try a few things to help him turn, and we tried EVERYTHING—laying inverted on an ironing board propped on the edge of the couch, flips in the indoor pool at the seminary, playing music and shining lights at the bottom of my belly, even moxibustion—but nothing worked. Finally, she tried turning him by pushing him with her hands (called an External Cephalic Version, or ECV), but she said she could feel his heels digging into her hand refusing to be moved. So we accepted that maybe he had a reason for not turning that we couldn’t see, but we continued to pray that he would turn before he was born.

Our midwife teamed up with another midwife who had breech birth experience, and we prepared for a homebirth, but were very realistic about the risks and the possibility of transferring to the hospital if everything didn’t go perfectly.

My mom came to visit us the Tuesday before he was due, and on Wednesday evening we walked several power laps around the mall. I had been having Braxton-Hicks contractions since about 20 weeks, and they got stronger after walking at the mall, but eventually petered out.

At 10 o’clock, we laid down to go to bed and I suddenly felt a *pop* and water started gushing all over our bed like a tsunami! I laid in bed and just laughed because it felt so weird. We knew this was it, so Josh started a pot of coffee and began filling the birth pool. I called the midwife and she came right over. Immediately, regular and intense contractions started coming. The midwife arrived, checked my progress, and said I was already 6cm dilated! Over halfway there and labor had just begun! We called the doula and told her to come on, anticipating that things would move quickly.

I showered and changed, stopping to relax and breathe through contractions. We made our way to the living room, and I had just knelt down against the couch when I felt a big kick and a rush of what I thought was more water. But the midwife told Josh to start the car—we were going straight to the hospital. It was blood that came out with that kick, and she was concerned. I was very disappointed, but I trusted the midwife and wanted the best for Jude. She continued listening to his heartbeat while Josh and Mom scrambled to get things together to go to the hospital, and his heartbeat stayed fine. She cautiously decided that as long as his heartbeat was fine, we could stay at home, so we did.

In order to keep a close eye on any more potential blood loss, the midwife said I shouldn’t get in the birth pool. I labored all night on the couch, sleeping between contractions (which has spaced out to about 15 minutes apart) and holding onto Josh during them. During this time I was also really cold.  I had every blanket in the house on top of me as I slept and labored.

Around morning, things started to pick back up.  During every contraction, I needed someone to squeeze my hips together as hard as they could.  I can’t explain it, but without the squeezing, it felt like I was going to split in half, but when someone was squeezing me, the contractions hardly bothered me at all.  I honestly enjoyed relaxing so deeply during contractions, and I’m told that I was one of the happiest, most polite laboring women that my birth team had ever seen!  I tried to stay positive, and when a contraction would be particularly intense, I would say, “Oh that was a good one!” I also kept thanking people, especially the doula (who did most of the hip squeezing), for helping me and doing things for me.

I remember asking the midwife around 4 AM if I was in transition, and she said that she thought I was.  I just knew it wouldn’t be much longer.

I tried to get back in the shower one more time, and the hot water felt SO good and helped so much, but it also made Jude’s heart rate rise.  The cooler water didn’t help as much, so we got out and went back to the living room.

Because Jude was feet first, rather than head or even butt first, and there wasn’t much pressure being put on my cervix, I never fully dilated. We kept waiting, hoping things would change, when around 8 or 9 AM, one of Jude’s feet pushed its way out into the world! Around the same time, my body started doing less contracting and more pushing.  I was fighting the urge to push in every way I knew how, but it was getting stronger and stronger.  I kept hoping that I would soon be fully dilated and it would be okay to let my body push him out, but it never happened. We knew that it wasn’t safe for him to be born unless I was fully dilated, so finally, at about 10 AM, we made the very difficult decision to transfer to the hospital for a c-section.

We checked into the ER and a lady started to enter my information into the computer.  After just a minute or so, I had a contraction and she realized that this was not early labor!  She jotted a few critical things down on paper and hurried us through.  A male nurse came with a wheelchair to take me to the exam room, but I couldn’t sit down because of his foot!  So I rode on my knees facing the nurse.  It was pretty comical.

Getting the epidural was probably the most painful, traumatic experience I’ve ever been through, and I’m not exaggerating in the least, but I won’t go into those details. The actual surgery/birth didn’t hurt at all.  It was a weird feeling; my belly felt like a big Jello Jiggler that kept jiggling around as they… I don’t know… did whatever they had to do to get him out.  Soon, we heard him cry.  He was finally born!  They took him over to weigh him and clean him up while they put me back together (more weird jiggling).  12 pounds and three ounces! I knew he felt big, but WOW!

It was so hard to hear him cry and not be able to comfort him. The doctor asked Josh if he had a camera.  We had forgotten it!  So his very first picture was taken with Daddy’s cell phone.  It is still difficult for me to look at that picture because his is crying so hard and he looks so cold, scared, and lonely.  This was not the way that I wanted him to be welcomed into this world. 

Nevertheless, Jude Elijah Hutchens was finally here and we couldn’t possibly love him more. I wouldn’t change a thing about his birth because I know that it was just the way he had to be born. I am so encouraged by the wonderful labor I had and how the contractions were actually pretty manageable the whole time.  I am also humbled by the incredible midwives and doula who believed in me enough to even give me a chance for a breech home birth, and thankful for the kind ER doctor who performed the c-section. I still believe in birth and look forward to my future VBAC (vaginal birth after cesarean) babies.

Stacy Leigh blogs at My Messy Manger about crafting, recipes, her family, motherhood, her time in Moldova, and is posting a photo a day all year long. I respect her so much as a mother, friend, and blogger and hope you will head over and check out her blog!